I recently finished listening to the audiobook of Mark Manson’s book, “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck” and there was one line that stood out, “Emotions are just feedback.”
I think there’s something to this, emotions indicate we are responding to the stimuli around us, often in relationships. As Dr. Bowen would say, “It’s a fact that we dream, what we dream isn’t necessarily a fact…” but it does say something about how we are responding to the world around us. It’s information… it’s telling us something. Something in our personal and relational matrix has been stirred up as David Freeman used to say. Sometimes it’s a comfortable emotion, like happiness or joy, but sometimes it’s an uncomfortable or so called “negative” emotional response.
It’s our challenge to try to put it in context and understand the data, the information. “Know thyself.”
The challenge in part is that our experience isn’t necessarily cause and effect, this causes that, but rather systemic. So, you have a collection of variable that come together to compose an outcome. Several variables come together to create a particular weather/climate experience. Humidity, temperature, etc.
Factors that Influence Weather (Study.com)
“Although it may seem like it sometimes, weather forecasters don’t just make up their predictions. They use the best available science, as well as three key variables that are critical to understanding weather: air pressure, temperature and air density. These variables are essential because, like a well-organized set of drill sergeants, they control how air behaves, and thus, they control the weather. However, they are not mutually exclusive. Like a set of siblings, each variable is closely related to the others (whether they like it or not!).”
Or if you look at our solar system of several planets and a sun that hold each other in a dynamic tension… what’s happening on planet earth doesn’t necessarily happen in isolation. It’s often part of what happening in relation to the sun or other planetary bodies.
It’s difficult for our brain to hold all the variables and understand them in a meaningful way, especially when our emotions are involved which are subjective at best. So, when there’s tension between mom and dad, and one of them praises the child or one of them picks on the child it may have to do with their relationship with their in-laws…